Some people dream of slowly walking away in silence as something spectacular goes up in flames behind them. Like the number one thriller that everyone dreams could be their life. And here I am to say...I watched someone walk that walk, while the flames simply engulfed me. I wasn’t ready to burn or be burned. No one knew to save me, except the one that lit the fire. And it’s magnificent from your view, but what about me. I’m too solid to be destroyed but God, that hurt, that hurt me more and more. And now even being home over a year later, I can’t find a place that isn’t marked with his “perfection”. I can’t find a clean place in the wreckage to rebuild new memories. When something like our drama happens in a small town the lies and gossip never really disappear. I heard them today as I walked into that place, where we went hundreds of times. They whispered and smirked with their lies and fake smiles. I hate that. The fakers. But what I came to find was this, when the smoke clears God is there. He was there through the flames and the smoke- I just couldn’t see Him. And so I let them talk, I smiled politely and I walked away because I realized that he was wrong. I am telling you that he will not ever find a heart that can withstand his flame. No heart can hold on this tight when all odds are pulling the other side. And so I walked away realizing I was walking away in silence as you went up in flames and I'm not looking back.
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